In 2007, Domeng and I, along with our eldest, Nico, attended the Family Encounter Weekend (FEW). Nico was only ten years old then. As a married couple, we were new members of the Magis Deo Community. We have not attended the LSS or the SDR. We were still “bagets” in the marriage encounter ministry. Nevertheless, we took the opportunity and opened ourselves to whatever grace God will give us.
Looking back, the FEW we had was not a feel good experience. Well, we had our moments but to me, I saw more of my flaws and imperfections as a mother. The typical Catholic, I was ridden with guilt. I was very disappointed with myself. If there was a grace I received that weekend, it was the acceptance of my mistakes and limitations. This awareness enabled me to prioritize what matters to my family more. This is not to say, however, that our family life has been perfect since the FEW. In fact, the challenge to set things right has been greater.
I think that’s how the conversion process works. Change takes time. It does not happen overnight. It is important to reflect upon the events of daily life to listen and see God’s will and design. Often, this is hard to know and discern. Yet, I keep the faith and hold on to hope. I often pray that one day, like a miracle, I will discover how beautifully God has transformed my family and I.
Just recently, I witnessed miracles in my family and in others too. The three of us (four actually since we brought our youngest, Zoe, as well) went back to BLD, Covenant House in Silang Cavite for this year’s FEW as auxilliary family. Our task was to help carry out a successful FEW for the six families who participated. Along with Teng and Gaya Antonio, and Ed and Sol Macalalad, we assisted Tito Eli and Tita Edith Prieto during that weekend of June 12, 13 and 14, 2009.
During that weekend, I saw my son’s willingness to lead the group in the community singing. He sings in the school choir, but leading a congregation is not in his level of confidence. Perhaps he has matured. Maybe it helped him gain confidence knowing that his father was beside him playing the accompaniment in his guitar. Or better still, it is the time given by God for him to sing and make a joyful noise.
Domeng is naturally shy and soft spoken in a crowd. He does not easily open up to people. That weekend, he was game. He joked around to ease my anxiety and reached out to the auxilliary team and participants of the FEW who needed help. Likewise, he bonded with Nico during song practice.
Our youngest, Zoe, who at eight is always seeking recognition, found her place during community singing time. Sitting beside his brother she sang along and held the rainmaker. This made her feel very much a part of the family. For the first time, she was introduced to the Magis Deo community through the FEW. She only knew about Magis Deo from our stories and the couples in our BCGG who visit when we have prayer meetings at home.
As for myself, I chose to stay behind the scenes, to sit back in the shadows and to watch my children and husband let their light shine. I have basked in superficial glory in years past. That weekend, I reveled in silent work and cherished the quiet joys of service.
It was definitely a weekend of miracles. I listened to my son’s almost pitch perfect voice. I saw my husband’s unfolding. I felt my daughter’s delight at simply being with her family and the bigger community that weekend. Best of all, the blessings that each family received that weekend was very much palpable in their smiles, their hugs and their demeanor. Once at home, I got a text message from one of the participants saying, “Salamat sa tulong ninyo, nabuo ulit ang aming pamilya.” To this I replied back, “Salamat rin, dahil nabuo rin ang sa akin.”
I am very much grateful to God who gave me a family. Despite myself, I am compelled to care and to love them the best way I can.
*For the Magis Deo Newsletter (July Issue)
