Wednesday, January 06, 2016

The Janus Project 2015: Year End Reflections Part 5

In 2015, I didn't get around to meet and touch base with old friends. I forgot how it is to be kind. I thought I was forever young.

I missed a friend's invitation to meet and chat over coffee. This happened in May when, right after graduation, this friend of mine had to leave for the US. Since then, I have not sent her an email or a PM. Though I often think about her and wonder how she's been, a physical and personal meet up would have done a lot of good for both of us. It really is an effort to keep in touch. Early in 2015, a college friend invited me to attend a mini-reunion. I missed this too. However, this friend has taken an effort to send PMs over at Facebook. Thanks to social media, our lines of communication are kept open. Then, there are friends who I have lost this year due to personal differences. I have decided never to go back to that level of friendship especially when I felt that my trust was compromised.

I think it is this broken trust that led me to forgot kindness. I was hurt. I know that the road to peace is forgiveness, but it took me a while to completely come into terms with my pain and my anger.

How was able to forgive then?

Well, getting sick is spiritual cleansing. So, what the heck with pain and anger? These emotions could have been the cause of my infection in the first place.

Once more, friends who stuck with me made me realize this. Alongside my husband's prodding to get a second opinion, the good friends who stood by me through my infection and medical journey pushed me to get that medical check up at a big hospital. At that point, I was even surprised to discover new friends at the work place.

For a while there, I have forgone kindness. But, at a time of need and illness, I was shown kindness. There is every reason to forgive; to be kind; to be good.

Happy new year and happy new me! Hopefully.

The Janus Project 2015: Year End Reflections Part 5

In 2015, I didn't get around to meet and touch base with old friends. I forgot how it is to be kind. I thought I was forever young.

I missed a friend's invitation to meet and chat over coffee. This happened in May when, right after graduation, this friend of mine had to leave for the US. Since then, I have not sent her an email or a PM. Though I often think about her and wonder how she's been, a physical and personal meet up would have done a lot of good for both of us. It really is an effort to keep in touch. Early in 2015, a college friend invited me to attend a mini-reunion. I missed this too. However, this friend has taken an effort to send PMs over at Facebook. Thanks to social media, our lines of communication are kept open. Then, there are friends who I have lost this year due to personal differences. I have decided never to go back to that level of friendship especially when I felt that my trust was compromised.

I think it is this broken trust that led me to forgot kindness. I was hurt. I know that the road to peace is forgiveness, but it took me a while to completely come into terms with my pain and my anger.

How was able to forgive then?

Well, getting sick is spiritual cleansing. So, what the heck with pain and anger? These emotions could have been the cause of my infection in the first place.

Once more, friends who stuck with me made me realize this. Alongside my husband's prodding to get a second opinion, the good friends who stood by me through my infection and medical journey pushed me to get that medical check up at a big hospital. At that point, I was even surprised to discover new friends at the work place.

For a while there, I have forgone kindness. But, at a time of need and illness, I was shown kindness. There is every reason to forgive; to be kind; to be good.

Happy new year and happy new me! Hopefully.